Commentary: When should children be allowed to have their own mobile phones?

SINGAPORE: Contempo news nearly the French issuing a nationwide ban on mobile phone apply in schools created a slight uproar, with ripples reaching here in Singapore where it is not uncommon to see children as young every bit those in Principal ane brandishing their ain mobile phones.

We all know the pros and cons of having a phone – the convenience of existence able to contact your children versus the danger of falling into different forms of cyber addiction. So how do we balance these out?

How should we be making our decisions as to whether or not to give our kids a telephone, when to requite it, and how to control information technology?

IS There Ever A GOOD AGE?

Is age a good guess for when to requite a child a phone?

Children develop and mature at their own private pace. While my daughter may be emotionally and mentally set to bear the responsibility for an expensive item like a phone by a sure age, I may not be able to say the same for her younger brothers, who may need a couple more than years to catch upwards to a similar level of maturity.

Some people would say it'southward not wise for a child in lower master to carry a phone as they may misplace it. My ain son who started Primary 1 this year has already lost an umbrella, a water bottle and a wallet (although this was later retrieved), so I cannot nonetheless fathom placing a mobile phone in his care at this stage.

There is also no demand for him to take i as I pick him from school every day. However, some kids start to travel home alone at an early age, so it's understandable that their parents would prefer for them to hold on to a phone so they tin can contact them if in that location is an emergency.

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A child plays a game on his phone (Photo: Reuters/Brendan McDermid) Penelope Patterson plays a game on his telephone at his home in Brooklyn, New York, U.S. December 13, 2016. Pic taken December 13, 2016. REUTERS/Brendan McDermid

So individual needs accept to be considered too – or the whys of having a telephone.

However, we have to bear in mind that the younger the child's age, the more controls need to exist set in place.

SETTING THE Stage FOR RESPONSIBLE Apply

Mayhap the question shouldn't be when or why to give your kid a phone, but how?

If y'all haven't set clear boundaries about technology utilise or had conversations most it with your child, then passing inferior a phone is likely to exist premature.

Giving a child a phone without prior preparation is like putting him on a table with ten marshmallows, telling him not to eat them, and then leaving the room. It doesn't have much to know what'll happen next.

I'yard referring to the Stanford marshmallow experiment of grade, which is a series of studies on delayed gratification. Its findings advise that children who are able to filibuster their gratification in order to receive an even better advantage – ii marshmallows instead of one – go on to do better in life.

Seeing that the phone is almost as tempting for lilliputian fingers as a fluffy white marshmallow, what nosotros want to do with children is this: Earlier letting them loose with the telephone, educate them on the benefits of having one, and provide some handles on how to manage potential pitfalls such as addictive behaviour and frequent notifications.

Information technology is this process of equipping them with the necessary skills to principal engineering that will enable them not to be enslaved to it in the future.

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We ofttimes underestimate the temptation that come in this v" by iii" gadget. Even adults get hooked on phones and our fourth dimension and free energy often get sucked away every bit nosotros roll mindlessly through apps and websites. So what more for children?

A person using a smartphone. (File photo: Xabryna Kek) File photograph of a person using a mobile phone.

A friend gave her girl her ain phone when she began using public transport at Primary 6.

About a year before that, she had started to actively introduce her to various apps, while taking care to mention the ways she manages phone distractions whenever she's working. She likewise allowed her daughter to use her phone's Whatsapp for school-related group chats.

In other words, she has been setting the stage for responsible employ, using her ain media habits as a model for her daughter.

There are also other controls we can put in place – such every bit setting a phone curfew then that the gadgets can be "retired" for the day and recharged, limiting time spent on games, and restricting social media utilize until the child is of a certain historic period and maturity.

EXAMINING OUR Ain VALUES

What do nosotros value as a family unit? What are our ain digital habits?

Asking such questions can help united states set the tone for how applied science is used in our homes.

If we value relationships, we volition take pains to lay gadgets bated before whatsoever social gathering.

If nosotros value family time, nosotros will establish some tech-complimentary zones and times in the house, so that nosotros can take hold of up properly at least once or twice a week.

If respect for elders is a big matter in our households, then we would encourage our young to interact with their seniors rather than stare at their screens the moment they stride into grandma's house.

Our values determine to some extent the way nosotros (and our offspring) collaborate with engineering.

Once set, these habits can be difficult to change, so it makes sense to think most them early on when our children are however open to instruction. It is a conversation that we need to keep going, not just at the point of handing our children a phone.

A child playing a mobile game. (Photo: Reuters) A kid plays the game "Honour of Kings" by Tencent at abode in Dezhou, Shandong province, Communist china July two, 2017. REUTERS/Stringer/Files

And equally our kids grow, the rules and routines may evolve with fourth dimension, but the values behind them normally don't modify.

Simply ANOTHER SKILL ON THE Listing?

Every bit parents, we are responsible for teaching our children multiple skills, from life skills such as learning how to button a shirt, to literacy and social skills.

Today, nosotros too demand to teach engineering science skills, not so much the technicalities of how to work a phone, but rather wise and responsible usage.

Just similar how we teach a child to ride a bicycle, we kickoff with the basics and set some ground rules to ensure safety.

Perchance we should give provisional licences to our kids when they offset having their own phones, or exercise upwards a family tech-time contract together. It will remind us to maintain strict controls and shut supervision, while also watching our own behaviour.

The more our children can show that they are able to handle the distractions and temptations that come with telephone ownership, the more trust we can offer in return.

Technology, minus the skills and maturity to handle it, tin can exist dangerous. But if nosotros give our kids the skills to manage engineering science, nosotros can be more confident in handing over a phone also – with a P-plate on it.

June Yong is a mother of iii, an educational therapist and owner of Mama Wear Papa Shirt, a blog that discusses parenting and education in Singapore.

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Source: https://cnalifestyle.channelnewsasia.com/commentary/when-should-children-be-allowed-their-own-mobile-smartphones-218411

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